February 23, 2009

Quality Time and a Vacation with Jesus

Where does the time go? I swear I just wrote a post the other day, but apparently it was almost a month ago. I'd promise to do better, but let's face it, I barely have time to shave my legs more than once a month let alone to actually write on my blog. (Too much information?) I figure if I post something every now and then so I can at least piece together what is going on then that's pretty good.

February was a good month. Generally speaking I hate February. I'm just not a big fan of Valentine's Day. I don't like the idea that someone decided on a day where how much you love someone is measure by how much you give them or what creative thing you think up. It means alot more to me when gestures of love are spontaneous rather than printed out on a calendar. However, this Valentine's Day really was a great day and Ben found wonderful ways to show me he appreciated me.

Friday, the day before Valentine's Day, we were invited to go to the UVU institute Valentine's Day Dance. The crazy thing was that you didn't even have to be enrolled in institute and it was totally free. This included a live band that played all the great "Big Band" music and dinner. They also had a room with ping pong, air hockey, foose ball (no idea how to spell) ect. We went with a couple in our ward and had a ton of fun. Ben even was a sport for going to the dance instruction before the dance started. He learned a little of the cha-cha, fox trot, and triple step. My feet were killing me, but it was fun to get all dressed up and do my hair all fancy. We haven't really gone to a dance together before and I love dancing, so it was alot of fun. It totally felt like high school all over again, without the awkward date feeling.

On Valentine's Day, Ben surprised me with this book:


We've borrowed it a couple times from people and read it, but I've always wanted my own copy. If you haven't read it yet, you really should. It's improved my marriage so much (even though we've always been happy together, this is just the icing on the cake). It helps you discover how to communicate love to your spouse and how they can communicate love to you. There are five basic ways people communicate love and it's fun to see how love means different things to different people. My love language is "Quality Time", so along with the book he got me this:


Probably doesn't make a lot of sense at first, but I was really excited about this. We like to play a fun game with the jelly bellies. You close your eyes and the other person puts a jelly belly in you mouth and you have to guess what flavor it is. It sounds so simple, but I really like playing this game at night before we go to bed. We end up talking alot during the game and laughing about silly things. It's good "Quality Time" for me.

Later on that day we went out to dinner to Ottavio's and were surprised to see Ben's sister Ruth there with her husband. We all were able to get a table together and had a great time. The restaurant was absolutely freezing, but we had fun laughing and watching me have some embarrassing moments.

So, the beginning of the month started off really good and then I got a phone call on Friday that my grandmother passed away. So, much for February being a good month. . . She had gone into the hospital a week or so ago and we were told she had about 6 months to live. Then her liver and kidneys failed and all the sudden it was a week left. A few days later she passed. Fortunately she slipped into a coma few days before she passed, so she wasn't in pain, but it was still very sudden.

I've never lost a grandparent before, so it's been interesting. I'm not sure what I should feel. I wasn't extremely close to my grandmother, but still I loved her. She was a good person, my dad's mother, and my grandpa's sweetheart. My grandpa, who is absolutely hilarious, isn't in the best of health either and I'm worried that he had just been "willing himself to live" until my grandmother would pass on. He's a vibrant man, but he's old and sick. The last time I saw him during Thanksgiving he seemed to be trying to say goodbye. I hope he hangs on for awhile, but I wouldn't blame him if he wanted to quickly reunite with his Lois.

Thursday we will be traveling to Boise for the funeral and even though it's under sad circumstances I'm excited to see my family again. My parents even said my other grandparents and my brother will be there which is exciting since I haven't seen either of them for 2-3 years.

I think the biggest blessing during all of this is my children. Once I got the phone call that she had passed, I knew I'd have to explain to them what had happened. We talked about where grandma's body would go and where her spirit was and it seemed so simple to them. They knew grandpa would be sad, but they also knew we should be happy because Grandma was with Jesus. They didn't have any doubts about seeing her again or where she was, because their testimonies are so pure and simple. We talked about how it's like Grandma is just on a long vacation with Jesus and they were glad because apparently "vacations with Jesus are fun." So now my kids are convinced that funerals are also fun. I'm so grateful for their optimism on life and the after life. It just reassures me that it's all true and I will see my grandma again and be able to join them on their vacation someday.

6 comments:

Colleen said...

i'm sorry to hear about your grandma. it is so wonderful to know that families are forever. sending you love and happy memories to you and you family.

Ruth Vest said...

that was so touching... that is a GREAT way to explain death to kids-good work. i hope things are going okay for you. grandparents dying is rough. i'm BUMMED we didn't get to see you guys yesterday. hopefully soon!

Anne said...

I am glad that Valentine's day was a good experience. It sounds like you guys really had a GREAT time. I am sorry to hear about your grandma. I hope that you are all okay....thank goodness for little children and their pure,simple faith! They sound like GREAT kids! Have a safe trip!

Evaly said...

Sorry to hear about your grandma, but I hope you have a good trip and enjoy your family. I love the jelly belly idea too- you are so fun!

Lisa-Marie said...

Arin, you look so beautiful all ready to go on your hot date!!!! What fun! I love the jelly belly game idea! I think I might steal it!

I am so sorry about your grandmother. You did a wonderful job explaining it to your children. I hope that you can have a good time in Boise.

Jenni said...

I'm very sorry to hear about your Grandma. I am glad you have such a positive attitude about it. Glad you had a great Valentine's day - sounds like a lot of fun.